Nice try

Concerned about his rapid mental decline, I called the nurse coordinator for advice. She recommended that I take him to the ER to rule out encephalopathy, a fancy word for really, really bad news. He does have a high bilirubin count, which causes extreme lethargy and malaise. Those words mean: you are still alive, but wish you were not. It is exactly as I had suspected; there is nothing left to be done, save a transplant, to help Scott...... but I had to try.

I really am trying to cope. I usually think of how things could be worse, in order to feel better about how things are right now. Unfortunately, the situation is such that any worse is too bad to imagine. I've had to switch over to thinking how nice it will be when Scott is better.

JA called while we were in the emergency room, "Mom? Don't forget the pencil sharpener, OK?" I had to explain to him why a pencil sharpener wasn't very high on my list of priorities at that moment. Alas, I am a softie, and purchased it on the most insane day at Walmart, while Scott's fluids were dripping in. If that's all it takes to thrill the boy out of his socks, then I guess I'm happy to oblige. Besides, it was nice to be able to "fix" something.

John and Kathy came to hold the fort. Our neighbors brought dinner. The kids helped clean the house and took baths. I am sending loves and a huge thanks to all.